Sinful Addiction

“Let’s end this, Aurae,” Enzo, my boyfriend, said after I confronted him for cheating on me.

The small restaurant suddenly felt even smaller. I couldn’t breathe. 

I couldn’t help but relive the moment dad left us for his new family when I was 11 all over again. I couldn’t stop the image of Mom crying for weeks in her room from floating into my head.

Love was something I’d secretly longed for but openly despised. It was something I’d craved for just as much as I hated it. Giving your heart to someone only for them to break it into pieces. 

But it always wasn’t like this. In fact, growing up, I’d been the biggest lover girl in history. But you couldn’t really blame me. All the Disney movies and Taylor Swift songs didn’t help much either.

"Why?” I’d ask.

“I don’t think this would work.” He pointed at the two of us.

“So that’s all you have to say?" 

“You slept with that wh*r*, Enzo , and this is all you have to say?”

“What do you want me to say? Huh Aurae? You were always so busy that it felt like I was the only one trying in this relationship, yet I’m at fault for cheating.”

"Look, Aurae, I don’t think I’m the right guy for you. I’m sorry.”

These words. These excuses.  I’d heard them enough. Dad, my first boyfriend, Noah, and now Enzo. They were all the same.

I’d stood up emotionlessly from the chair in the small restaurant.

“Okay,” I said monotonously, picking up my purse from the table and leaving the restaurant without another word.

I could hear the thud of my heart with each step I took towards the bus stop. I felt numb. Too numb to feel hurt. Too numb to cry. 

I’d vow there and then never to fall in love again. All men were scum anyway.

Aurae’s pov

The sound of children laughing, the sight of adults talking, teenagers working on their assignments while sipping coffee, and the soft whispers from those gossiping inside the cafe had always been soothing to me. The smell of the different types of coffee, chocolate, pastries, and everything else about this small, adorable cafe strangely seemed to calm me. They made me forget that life existed outside the cafe. This is how life is meant to be—sweet like pastries, soothing like coffee, and comforting like hot chocolate. Unfortunately, it wasn’t. I just want to sit in the cafe all day and romanticize life. Unfortunately, I have responsibilities I couldn’t avoid.

Munching on the remaining bar of chocolate I had hurriedly taken from the kitchen this morning, I glanced outside through the translucent glass windows. I could see the weather was changing. Nowadays, the weather is unpredictable. One minute it was sunny, and the next it was ra