HER PAIN, HER STRENGTH

Freya

I look at myself in the mirror and all I see is this unattractive being. Why was I created this way, it’s like all the flaws were given to me. I have tried all that I can to no avail, I still remain this unattractive, fat and shapeless female.

Saying I hate myself is an understatement, I despise myself.

If I had enough money or if I was rich, I would have gone for plastic surgery, but even that, I am incapable.

My name is Freya Henly, I am seventeen years old, but I look like a forty-year-old woman, I am 5ft 2 inches in height, shortest of my kind. Everyone towers over me, I weigh 225 pounds, I am basically obese. Despite starving myself, I still don’t even shed a pound.

My life is so miserable!!!

Why was I even born, I don’t see the need for my life, I can’t run, I can’t dance, I don’t have a wolf. All my mates got theirs when they turned sixteen, but I am yet to get mine. Maybe I will never get one. The thought of being wolf less all my life is like horror.

“Hey Freya, you will be late.” My mother’s voice brings me back to my senses. Do I have to go to school? What for anyway.

We moved here from my pack, my parents couldn’t take how I was bullied in my old pack so when an opening was here for work, they took it wholeheartedly. I felt so bad that they had to leave their pack for me. Now they have to work twice as hard as they did before. I just hope that I have it good here, at least make some friends, it will really make me happy.

I bid my mum farewell, pick up my apple and head to school. I only eat an apple for the whole day, it kills me to starve, but I don’t have any choice.

The school is quite a distance from my house, walking to school is hectic, I am dripping in sweat since I have a hoodie on and baggy jeans. I try as hard as I can to hide my enormous breasts from the world. I don't even wear a bra, because if I do, they choke me.

I have to endure the heat during summer that’s why my favorite time of the year is winter.

I hear some whispers and people stop on the way to look at me, I thought it would be different, but prejudices are everywhere.

“Like an elephant.” a passerby says and the other chuckles. I have lived like this ever since I was a child. I was born overweight, my mum had to undergo a cesarean section just to have me, and it’s unheard of in wolves.

Finally, I can see the school from a far, it’s enormous and so beautiful. The gate is huge, and it’s surrounded by tall trees, wow, the scenery is just on another level. The only problem is that it’s on a hilly ground, and by the time I get to the gate, I am breathing so heavily, until I am producing some weird sounds, all I want is to sit down and have some water. But I can’t because I have to register my details at the gate first. I swear I am going to faint if the line doesn’t move faster. This is why I hate myself everything is a limitation to me.

“Next.” The gate woman shouts, looking at me with her clear eyes full of arrogance. “I don’t have all day miss, can you hurry.” she says, taking my documents from my shaking hands? She is so intimidating.

“Go to the administration block.” She commands, shoving my papers back to me.

“Where is the admin-?”

“Next.” She shouts before I can even finish my sentence.

I am left stranded, where do I start from, the school is huge and I cannot see any signs? Everyone I try to talk to seems to ignore me. I look at my papers and sigh heavily. Just as I am about to lose hope, I see a foreign paper, the arrogant gate lady must have placed it with the rest of my papers. I realize it’s a map of the school.

Thank you goddess!!!

I study my map carefully as I walk slowly, I see the gate, right the administration block is…

I suddenly bump into someone, causing myself to lose balance, before I know it, I hit the ground on my behind, causing my papers to be scattered on the ground.

“Ouch!” I say out loud as the pain washes over me, how am I even going to stand now.

“What the f*ck, b***h. Can’t you look where you are going, huh? ” I raise my head, and I am met by the most beautiful person in the whole world. Oh! no! I notice the coffee spilled all over his white t-shirt.

“I am sorry I didn’t see you.” I say in my most polite tone. I just wanted to have a drama less first day, but I guess I am the queen of drama, I attract trouble. I can see his blue eyes burning with rage literally.

“Get up!!” he commands, I notice a small crowd surrounding me already. Everyone seems so quiet, but I cannot miss the smirks and the eye rolling. I try so hard to get up, but I can’t seem to carry my body, I seem heavier than before.

“Get up, fat b***h.” He utters, the tears I have been holding start to stream down my face uncontrollably. I know I am fat, but being called that way hurts so much.

“Help the fatty up.” he says, and two boys come forward to help me up.

“Phew!! She weighs tonnes.” One of them says after they get me up. The crowd bursts out laughing, I feel so small, yet I am so big. I try to run away from them, but who am I kidding, I can’t even jog.

“She can’t even run.”

“She is so disgusting.” A female voice says, instead of helping me as a woman.

“Can you all stop this and go to your classes?” an authoritative voice says, I presume it’s a teacher. I am happy she came to my rescue because I don’t know what could have happened to me.

“I will make you pay for ruining my favorite shirt.” The blue-eyed boy says, the seriousness in his eyes makes me shiver. “Fatty.” He adds before walking away cursing under his breathe.

“I am sorry miss, don’t worry about him, he is just full of himself. I am Miss Rose; I can tell you are new here, right.” She smiles lovingly picking my scattered papers. I just nod, I can’t speak, my tears are choking me.

“Oh okay you are supposed to be in room 102B.” she says, her smile dying down, why did she change all of a sudden?

FreyaMiss Rose walks with me to room 102B, her jovial mood changes abruptly, she turns and looks at me pitifully, suggesting that there is something wrong. The problem is that I don’t know why she is this way. My b*tt can’t stop hurting because of the fall I just had, not forgetting the fleet of stairs we had to walk to get to 102B. Will I manage all this each and every day? Oh! Goddess, I need your help because alone, I won’t be able to do this. I am only doing this for my parents by the way, they came all the way here just for me, so I have to do something to pay them back, and what is more than having a good education and becoming someone important someday in the future. Plus, I will have money finally for my surgery. The thought of surgery, gives me a little hope. “Hey Luke it’s the fatty.” a loud voice distracts me from my thoughts. I look at where it’s coming from, and I freeze, I now know why Miss Rose changed