The Doctor's Convict
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What is an obsession? An idea or thought that continually preoccupies or intrudes on a person's mind. And this is what my brother thinks I have and feel toward Lola. He always asks me to be patient and wait till he figures out how to get her back to me, but I can't sit like an obedient dog and wait. I can't live my life as if nothing had happened and my soul wasn't just ripped out of my body. Lola isn't just an obsession to me, she is my life and soul, she is my beating heart. I watched her grow under my care, I waited for her to mature, I fucking protected her even from myself. From that mindless animal that I am, and when I finally could get what I have always wanted, it was taken away from me. My brother is wrong, I'm not obsessed I am possessed and I will fucking take everyone down to get my little flower back. *The doctor's convict is book 2 in women of mafia series, you need to read book 1 (Cerberus) first.
I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and almost coughed. The air was stale and full of dirt, but it was something to expect.
This house wasn’t cleaned for over six years, and maybe more than that. I just bought it six years ago, and it was the best decision to make.
I breathed in again and shuddered as I listened to the blaring music and lyrics of the song playing at the moment.
Goëtia, by Peter Gundry, the entire album, is a masterpiece. I always loved to listen to it, among other things, while I was in the middle of a hard or impossible surgery.
It makes me feel at peace; it calms the turmoils that fighting inside of me. Inside my heart, soul, and mind.
It makes the voices calmer or thrown away in the background as if they were some noise somewhere far away from me.
It made me focus on what I was doing and at the moment; I needed that. I need a clear head to deal with this…..thing.
I stretched my head right and left, then started to take off my clothes. I started with the white dress shirt and folded it neatly on a chair, then down till I stood only in my boxers and I almost shuddered.
Not from the cold or the faint wind that got inside from the open balcony. No, it was from excitement. I chuckled.
Gabriel always called me his little hyper puppy because I get so excited when I am about to do something or planning it.
And he was right. Fuck, I even battling an erection at the moment. The anticipation of cutting off the flesh and drawing blood is fucking killing me.
But then all of that excitement and even possible erection died when I heard the soft whimpers and small cries coming from behind me.
I snarled as I turned around to look at the man who was tied up in a small chair in his birthday suit. He looked pathetic as he stared at me with his crying eyes and snot running down his face.
I walked toward him softly, but my bare feet made the wood creak. I need to renovate this old house.
I did nothing to it since I bought it from that friend who owned someone's money and I think I should start after dealing with this garbage.
I kneeled in front of the forty-something man and stared at him thoughtfully. He can’t be one of Alessio’s men. He looks so coward-ish.
“Look, I don’t want to hurt you and I promise if you told me what I want the moment you open your mouth, I will let you go. But if you lied to me, you would make this hard for the both of us. I mean, I don’t like hurting people, you know?”
I said in a calm voice, smiling a little and I don’t know why his shivering intensified. I mean, I was playing nice with him.
I sighed, shaking my head in annoyance, but I gave him the same smile again as I took off the tape that was covering his mouth.
“I…..I.. swear…I know nothing about him…. I….am just his driver when he is in town…I don’t even do it that much. Only when he needed to go somewhere without anyone noticing. I gave you all the addresses he frequented.”
The man said, sobbing, no wailing, and I closed my eyes again, sighing. This was getting on my nerves. The poor fucker thinks that I’m playing here with him.
I stood up and checked the IV drip I had attached to him. He has been here for a couple of days and I can’t have him die on me, right?
Then I checked his neck where the thing was connected and hummed as I looked at his legs and arms, or at least what remained of them.
I cut most of them off when we talked the first time. I mean, I had to make him spill everything he knew, and, to be honest, I was angry. But fortunately, they weren’t bleeding anymore.
They fucking took her away from me. They took her when I was about to claim her.
I have watched her grow from a little small girl to that amazing, beautiful, confident young lady.
I put my fucking self on a leash in order to let her have her healthy life, to grow under my care, to become who she is right now.
I waited years and years, and when the right moment came, they just took her from me. They prevented me from tasting what I had been craving all these years.
And for that, all of them will suffer. They will all pay for what they have done. They will pay for making her taint her little soft hands with blood.
I threw my head back and screamed as I tore off some of my hair. I screamed from all the anger; I screamed from all the pain that was choking me.
I screamed from all the violence that was swarming inside of my chest. The voices kept telling me to rage and destroy all.
They said that I deserved to do whatever the fuck I wanted because I held myself back. I held myself back for her, for me, and for the rest of the family.
But I can’t lose it now. I need to keep it together for a little longer because I’m getting her out of there at any cost. Even if I had to fuck up everything and everyone, even myself.
My sweet, innocent Lola will be back to me and in my arms. She will be back.
I started to breathe slowly to calm myself and remember her, remember the way she laughed or smiled, remember the way she looked at me for what felt like hours when she thought I didn’t notice.
I remembered how she smelled and how her body moved when she passed me by. I remembered how her voice turned sweet and soft when she talked to me.
And I was getting calmer already, but then the fucker had to open his mouth again and the sweet vision of my Lola disappeared.
My eyes burst open, glaring at the fucker, and he shut up abruptly. I know how I must look at the moment and he was afraid, as he should be.
“Then let us spare you this horrible life and save your pathetic soul.”
I said, grinning like a madman, which was right. I’m crazy. I have always been and I will always be. But the moment I set my eyes on Lola, I have locked all this shit down in the back of my head.
I ignored all the voices that were begging me to be set free. I decided to be a good man for her. I wanted to be there with her.
The man choked on nothing and he opened his mouth again to say something, maybe begging me to set him free because he knows nothing, but I just held his open mouth in my hand, then pulled his tongue out.
I cut it off in one move and it took him a moment to understand and feel the pain of what I did.
I watched him swallowing quickly, trying to get rid of the blood that suddenly filled his mouth, but it was too much so he just opened his mouth and tried to bend forward making it pour out.
I watched him for a moment then tsked because this was taking so long, but I wanted the fucker to suffer so I made other cuts all over his body and watched him bleed like a fucking pig.
I stood a couple of minutes watching the scene, thinking that it would calm me a little, but this didn’t happen at all even when I chopped the rest of his body off and bagged it, then got rid of it.
Even the back home ride did nothing to me, but I had to put on my fake glasses as I went inside the mansion because I knew what was waiting for me inside. I have been absent for two days..
“Good evening. You all are here waiting for me?”
I said in a sweet voice with a wide smile on my face as I leaned down kissing Ariel’s left cheek.
The girl was smiling at me sadly, and my eyes went down to her slight bump. It is early, but she is starting to show. That baby is going to be a strong one. A perfect heir to my brother.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Michael? You have been absent for almost three days. We knew nothing about you, and your phone was turned off. Where the fuck were you and don’t tell me in the hospital because I fucking sure you weren’t there.”
My brother roared at me and I stood up, smiling at him awkwardly as I scratched my head while speaking.
“I’m sorry. I know that I have worried all of you, but I needed some time alone. But I promise that it will never happen again, big brother. Now, if you all excuse me, I need to take a shower and get some sleep. I have a hospital to go to tomorrow.”
I said, turning around and nodding my head to Leonidas when I passed him, but he held my arm, stopping me.
“She asked about you today again, You need to visit her, Mic. She is worried about you. We all are.”
Leo said, making me swallow harshly, and I pulled my arm away without answering him. No, I can’t go there. I can’t see her looking like this. I just can’t because if I did I might do something I will regret later. I’m barely hanging by a thin thread and it will snap if I see her.
“I know what wearing these fucking glasses mean Michael. It was me who told you about this little trick and I don’t fucking like what you are doing right now, but I won’t stop you as long as it makes you feel in control. But if things escalated I will intervene, brother. Do you hear me? Lola might be your anchor now, but I have been your rock before her and I won’t hesitate to smash that head of yours in order to save you.”
Gabriel said when I was about to put my foot on the first step and I clenched my jaws harshly, almost cracking my teeth.
Yes, Lola is my anchor, my purpose in life, and my savior. I belong to her.
It is like clockwork. A never ending torture.
I became afraid of closing my eyes and having some sleep because he always visits me in my dreams and makes me relive that moment I killed him over and over again.
Sometimes it is me who is scared and running away from him as he limps toward me while dragging his leg behind him.
And no matter how hard I try, I can’t escape him. He catches me and I fall to the ground, panting and sweating.
He then crawls on top of me and starts choking me, and I just freeze beneath him as his hands tighten around my neck, making me gasp for air.
He usually watches me down with hatred in his eyes as blood and tears run down his face and sometimes I feel like touching his face, comforting him.
Because this was my doing, I have killed this man and I have to live with the burden of it all. I must suffer for taking that soul, no matter what i
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