The Superstar

Tinignan ko ang aking sarili sa salamin bago maglagay ng lipstick. A red party dress that is above the knee, low neck that reveals my collarbone and my cleavage and a perfectly beach wave curled hair. I look stunning, not gonna lie.

But why did he cheated?

I hold my breath as I start to feel my tears forming again. I bit my lip as I stare at myself. Pilit kong pinapasok sa utak ko na hindi siya kawalan, our relationship only lasts for 4 months kaya kayang-kaya ko pa maiangat ang sarili ko in no time. I just need to gather myself up.

“You are gorgeous, Zoey” I smiled and let out a long sigh.

“Kaya siya nag-cheat sayo kasi you are too good for him and naghahanap siya ng ka-level niya because our level is too high for him” I said once again before grabbing my handbag and walking out of the room.

Paglabas ko ng kwarto ay sumalubong sa akin ang tahimik na kapaligiran, hindi lang dahil gabi na and it’s almost midnight pero dahil walang ibang tao sa bahay kung hindi ako. My mother and younger sister are in New York. She has been casted as an artist kaya sinamahan siya ni Mom to guide her, my Father has a business in United States so he can’t go home yet. Since I’m 23, they leaved me here, hindi naman siya nakakalungkot since it’s my own decision to stay in South Korea

Dumiretso na ako sa pintuan matapos kong patayin ang lahat ng ilaw then I went out and locked the door.

The ride going to bar only took me 15 minutes dahil walang traffic at gabi na rin kaya hindi masyadong marami ang mga sasakyan. I got out of the car after parking

The bouncer looked at me as I walk towards him, nang malapit na ako ay itinaas ko ang ID ko at diretsong pumasok sa loob. I’m 23 years old and yet some people still mistaken me as a teenager.

Rinig na rinig ang malakas na musika na pumapalibot sa kabuuan ng bar, dumiretso ako sa counter to look for my friend. I smiled as I saw her mixing some beverages infront of the customers. Umupo ako sa katabing upuan ng isang lalake habang hinihintay na matapos si Sierra sa pag-mix ng mga beverages. I simply look at the guy beside me, nakatutok ito sa cellphone niya . As he keeps his self busy with his phone, I took it as an advantage to stare at him. He has jet black hair with his slicked back hairstyle, from his side profile I can say that he wins the most perfect side profile, he has sharp jawline that can cut a rock, he has forward rounded forehead, a perfectly angled nose, deep concaved philtrum and slightly lifted upperlip. I proceeded to study him, bumaba ang tingin ko sa mga braso nito, it’s veiny which makes him more attractive to me, he’s wearing a black t-shirt, and a black pair of jeans with his white shoes.

Damn, how can a guy be this so damn attractive even when wearing simple clothes?

“Are you done checking me out, lady?” bahagya akong nagulat nang magsalita ito. I quickly hide it nang ipihit nito ang ulo paharap sa akin.

Damn, he’s so gorgeous. Including his deep voice, sobrang sarap pakinggan sa tenga.

“Perhaps you can stand up and turn around so that I can check you out more” I said in a joking manner.

Inilapag na ni Sierra ang inumin nito sa harap ng lalake but the guy didn’t pay attention to the drink nor Sierra, his eyes are fixed on mine.

Bahagya itong ngumiti, “You’re too young for me. Sorry hindi ako pumapatol sa bata” with that kinuha nito ang drink at naglakad palayo.

I was speechless as I watch him walk away, rinig na rinig ko naman ang napakalakas na tawa ni Sierra sa kabila ng malakas na tugtog. Hinawakan nito ang kabilang balikat ko at niyugyog making me look at her. Tumatawa pa rin ito.

Tinitigan ko lang ito hanggang sa matigil siya sa kakatawa, after a minute she stopped. “That was the freaking funniest thing I have ever heard today” she said while wiping her eyes. I rolled my eyes and placed my bag in the table.

“Whatever, just give me some alcohol please” saad ko at nangalumbaba.

He’s hot, he could be the one na makaka-usap ko ngayong gabi and the one that I will be exchanging numbers. Damn this face.

“Don’t worry, you’re still beautiful” saad ni Sierra nang makita akong nakapangalumbaba, inilapag nito ang tequila sa table. Kinuha nito ang bag ko at inilapag sa ibaba ng counter table. She knows what I’m going to do here at walang magbabantay sa bag ko dahil palagi naman akong mag-isa na pumupunta sa bar. She’s the only friend I have that’s why.

Nginitian ako nito bago puntahan ang ibang customers, I took a shot and signalled the other barista to get me a drink again.

Binigyan ako nito ng isang bote at ng isa pa at ng isa pa. Then I pour it on the shot glass myself.

Magpapakalasing ako ngayong gabi, I want to get wild since ngayon na lang ako ulit naging malaya ng ganito and free from restrictions from anybody even my ex-boyfriend.

Hindi ko alam kung nakaka-ilang inom na ba ako but the only thing I know ay medyo lasing na ako and I suddenly have the urge to get up from my seat and go to the dance floor and so I did. I hastily dragged myself into the dance floor as I smile. Then the next song played, my favorite. Cool For The Summer by Demi Lovato, huh. I often dance to this song sa tuwing nasa bahay ako.

I joined these strangers dancing to the song, both were man and women and they are dancing by partner. Some even start to grind their bodies but no one judged, this is the place where everyone can express themselves, this is the place where adults should enjoy after a stressful day or a heartbreak. So I started to dance, napagitnaan ako ng mga may partner na nagsasayaw kaya walang lalake ang nakakalapit, which is good but I also want someone to dance with.

The chorus came and the crowd became wild including myself, we jumped and dance. Sa sobrang gulo ay kung saan-saan ako napunta until I bumped onto someone. Due to rush of joy and blurred vision, ipinulupot ko ang mga braso ko sa may leeg nito and started grinding, I don’t know if this is a girl or a boy but I want to enjoy as much as I can. I started grinding my body onto its body, tumalikod ako rito but my body is still touching its body. After some seconds, I feel its hands on my hips as I start to feel it moving in-sync with me. Now I know this is a boy, wala akong na feel na bukol sa likod ko and the movement is too boyish. To confirm it, hinawakan ko ang kamay nito and I was right, his hands are veiny and big compared to mine. I don’t care though, I want to dance.

We continued to dance until the next song played, my second favorite song. Champagne &Sunshine by PLVTINUM and Tarro, this gives me the rich party girl vibe. We continued to dance, everyone is enjoying the song including myself and I think my partner is also into it.

“Face me” malakas ang tugtog ngunit narinig ko pa rin ang boses nito. I felt his hot breath on my ears and his lips that brushed in my skin. I got the goosebumps but I still did what he said.

Pagharap ko ay hindi ko inaasahan kung sino ang nakita ko. It was the guy from earlier!

But why does he looks so much smaller than he is awhile ago?

But, sh*t. I can’t let this guy slip away again, matapos ng sinabi niya sa’kin kanina. I’m not a child or a teenager. I will prove him wrong.

I tiptoed and kissed him on the lips. He didn’t move, he must be so shocked. I prepared myself to be pushed away, ngunit hindi iyon ang inaasahan kong mangyari. He grasp my waist and pulls me closer as he starts to move his lips, I started to move mine as well. His lips feels so soft and moist as I feel his hot breath on mine. It maybe weird but the kiss just started to deepen a few seconds ago and I already feel addicted, hindi ko alam kung epekto ba ‘to ng alak o hindi. He pushed my head much closer to deepen the kiss more, I was almost out of breath when I feel his tongue entered my mouth. His tongue starts to explore my mouth as I feel his other hand going down to my buttocks. I immediately feel something in my stomach when he starts to squeeze my buttocks. Ipinulupot kong muli ang mga braso ko sa leeg nito as I start to fight with his tongue ngunit hindi pa man din lang ito nagtatagal ay naramdaman ko ang pag-flash ng kung anong maliwanag, saglit lamang ito ngunit masakit sa mata, sa tingin ko ay galing ito sa crowd pero hindi ko alam kung ano iyon.

Before I knew it, he ended the kiss. Hinawakan nito ang kamay ko at hinila ako sa kung saan. Matapos ang ilang minuto na pakikipagsiksikan sa mga tao ay nakalabas na kami. Magsasalita na sana ako ng bitawan nito ang kamay ko at naglakad palayo. I squinted my eyes to see where he will go but I can’t seem to see properly. I just shrugged it off at pagewang-gewang na naglakad papunta sa counter table. I requested another bottle of drink.

Lahat na lang iniiwan ako.

F*ck them.

Hindi ko na isinalin sa shot glass ang alak at diretsong ininom ito sa bote. I smiled as I feel the burning sensation in my throat. I love my life.

Matapos ang isa pang oras na pag-inom ay napag-desisyunan ko ng umuwi. I asked Sierra to give me my bag back which she did. I rested my hand on the table as I tried to balance myself.

“Pwede kita ipahatid, delikado sa labas” nag-aalalang suhestyon ni Sierra. I shrugged my head and smiled widely, hindi ko alam but it feels right and cute if I smiled widely.

“Kaya ko” nakangiting saad ko before waving her goodbye.

Hindi ito makaalis sa pwesto niya dahil sunod-sunod ang pag-order ng mga tao ng alak which is good dahil alam kong aalalayan ako nito palabas and will wait hanggang sa makasakay ako ng taxi. She nags a lot sa tuwing nalalasing ako, she’s like a mom.

I was almost at the door when a guy stopped me.

“Drink” I squinted my eyes to see who it is pero blurred ang vision ko and I can’t recognize faces. I tried to shrugged him away ngunit hindi ito umalis sa harapan ko.

“Just drink this and I will let you go”

I just nodded my head as an obedient child and took the glass from him. Diretso ko itong ininom bago ibigay sa kaniya at maglakad palabas ng bar. I suddenly feel dizzy but I still tried to walk. Halos matumba ako sa paglalakad at mabangga kung kanino.

I finally managed to get out of the bar and started to walk to fetch some taxi. Bigla akong napatigil ng makaramdam ako ng matinding hilo, para bang paulit-ulit na inaalog ang ulo ko. And before I knew it, I’m already at the ground and feeling sleepy. Before I closed my eyes, I hear the beeping sound of a vehicle.

Warm and Cozy. The last time that I felt this was when I was a child and my parents were beside me when I had a nightmare. Parang biglang may nagbago sa room ko, my room usually smells fresh like a lemon, pero bakit amoy pabango ng lalake ang naaamoy ko?

Weird.

Itataas ko sana ang mga kamay ko para mag-inat ngunit hindi ko ito maigalaw. So I decided to open my eyes and I was greeted with an unfamiliar environment. Madilim, kakaunting ilaw lamang ang tumatagos sa napakalaking bintana na natatakpan ng makapal na kurtina na sapat para makita ko na wala ako sa kwarto ko.

I was about to get up when I hear a moan and a hot breath brushes my neck. Followed by a deep voice, “ Who are you?” tanong nito sakin. I can still feel his arm laying in my waist as I try to compose myself.

“What happened last night?” tanong ko dito, attempting to remove his arm from my waist, ngunit bigla itong pumaibabaw sa akin, with the blanket still covering our body. Bigla akong nanigas